My wife and I wanted a family and we spent a lot of money trying. I just thought I’d never be a mother. One day after another failed attempt and a broken heart my wife said, “Can we stop now?” I agreed. A few weeks later my wife said "shall we look at adoption?" It’s something that had never crossed my mind and wasn’t even sure we would be allowed. So in April 2018 our journey began.
My wife and I are both in education so naturally we did our homework with researching Local Authorities (LAs) and Voluntary Adoption Agencies (VAAs). We found that VAAs seemed more proactive and had a more personalised approach. We found an agency that fitted the bill and this was Adoption Focus. With our education background we had noted that Adoption Focus had an 'Outstanding' Ofsted rating. This was important to us. As we came to find over the next few months, Adoption Focus was indeed 'Outstanding'. Adoption Focus has asked me to write about our experience as an LGBT+ adopting family.
We went along to an information evening in April 2018 and filled out some forms to arrange a home visit. I was so nervous. The staff were friendly and extremely helpful. We were accepted on to stage 1 training in July 2018. We were the only gay couple in our group and it made me nervous. I asked questions about possible placements and would they give us children if we were gay. The team put my mind at ease. With paperwork underway and various checks and references done we were now on Stage 2 in October 2018. Our social worker was amazing and our sessions were relaxed and even quite cathartic. We went to the approval panel in February 2019 and were now approved adopters. I couldn’t believe it, this is actually happening. Skipping on a bit, by April 2019 we had a match and by June 2019 we had our son. A little over a year from our first contact with Adoption Focus to parenthood.
Throughout this process we had so much support, I never felt at any time that we had any issues due to the fact we were a same sex couple. It was just so easy. The hardest part was deciding who was Mummy and who was Mamma. The foster family welcomed us into their home with open arms, the social workers never even uttered a word about our sexuality, we were simply a loving couple that wanted a child.
So if you have love to give please have a look into adoption. We as the LGBT+ family can offer so much. Contact Adoption Focus today. Two may become three or four maybe even five. Good luck and remember love is love, it has no limits.
You can follow Claire's family's story on Facebook and Instagram.
